Here is a link to my video so far:
Today I met with Will, to show him the changes I had made with the new shots using DIY filters and the addition of credits.
We watched the video together and went over it in great detail. Suggestions that were disguised were:
- Remove the DIY filter footage and re-shoot – what the problem is, is that the footage made using the DIY filters is very different than without. The footage without is sharp and crisp, where-as the DIY footage is more blurry, grainy and of a lesser quality. Now this could be seen as textured and a nice variety throughout, but as this is a showcase of my work it is best to keep the entire piece matching and uniform with high quality footage. Learning the DIY techniques was certainly not a waste of time as I have learn so much along the way which I can use in the future.
- Drop the Scene of Archie against a tree and standing at 0:46. – Its is actually not in focus anywhere.
- Drop the amount of locations down to say, 4 of equal lengths, each being 1/4 of the entire film, lengthen the scenes focus on the quality parts.
- Instead of running behind a car – how about running through the flowers at the park to match the pink scenes.
- 1:01 -Bleach it out using curves, raise highlights, match the saturation, lengthen it do the same at 1:04.
- The drawing scene can be dramatically cut, there only needs to be an implication of drawing, and slow it down to normal speed.
- Cut the rice bubble bowl.
- One key colour – Pink. ref to M.Night Shyamalan – In this link it explains M.Night Shyamalan’s trade marks in film http://www.cinelinx.com/movie-stuff/item/4001-directors-trademarks-m-night-shyamalan.html with this piece of the article relating to me – Retrieved 4/11/14 from above link.
- Remove parts of the imagery which is more unsavory eg: Spitting out water in bath scene, and tooth paste hanging from mouth. The reason being that although it is a real and accurate portrayal of children – it isn’t beautiful (of-course the beauty of it is debatable) like the rest of the scenes. This piece of moving imagery will ultimately be used for marketing – it needs to be perfect and aimed more at the type of clientele I would want to employ me.
- Rather than use the file at the end of the clip which is a bit tacky and modern, how about trying a envelope, abd burying it.
- Remove the parts of the bath scene which show naked torsos – re-shoot with just implications of them in the bath, hands with bubbles, heads etc… (for obvious reasons)
- The final credits come in too fast lengthen the time that the screen is white before ‘Eliana & Archie Taylor’ comes in.
- Try Lucida Grande and Raleway Regular fonts – cleaner and sharper.
- Make the font in entire credits smaller.